Things were slow this week. I watched a squirrel gather nuts in my backyard for a half hour, and then emptied a jar of honey, just for a good measure. There just really wasn’t much to report on.

I mean, this thing called the iPad came out, but who cares? No one. There really wasn’t much news coverage. It was pretty low-key as far as launches go. I’m not really sure what we talked about on this episode anyhow, so you’ll have to listen in to find out. I think our good friend Stephen Hanbury might have made an appearance. I was too busy tying my shoes in different lacing patterns.

I hope you know we’re kidding. There’s 40 minutes of pure, iPady goodness in here, with everything we hated, and everything we liked. It’s a wellspring of information, so if you don’t know what all the hype is about, we’ve got you covered. Listen here, or at the Not So Much News!

Length: 41:10
Close: More than a feeling – Boston
Download: 39.5 MB
iTunes / RSS

CAUTION: REALITY DISTORTION FIELD AHEAD

This is a warning. If you do not like Apple, or do not wish to further indulge in the Padocalypse, then proceed no further. Here be dragons. And crushed dreams. And, of course, the iPad.

This is Apple’s “latest creation,” a 9.7 inch tablet that is, in essence, eight iPhones taped together. Notable features include:

• A capacitative, multi-touch screen — perfect to showcase your grubby fingerprints to friends and family
• A custom, Apple-made 1GHz A4 chip, whatever that means. Moles are investigating.
• FLAVOURS, as long as your idea of flavours is 16, 32 or 64GB
• Wifi in all models, and 3G in the more expensive kind, with GPS, internal compass and ALL THAT JAZZ
• iPhone OS 3.2 — pretend you have invented an anti-shrink ray device, and amaze your friends with your “new, larger phone”
• Fancy applications, from the likes of EA, the New York Times and a mobile version of iWork
• eBooks, in an iTunes like platform. Which, by the way, also includes an actual mobile iTunes.

AND SO MUCH MORE. Which, of course, we talk about. Because it wouldn’t be a product release party if me and Anand didn’t tear it to shreds, and give you the lowdown on what we love and hate. After all, it’s just the sort of stuff we like to touch upon. Ahem.

Length: 32:42
Close: Demon Days [Instrumental] – Gorillaz
Download: 31.4 MB
iTunes / RSS